All posts in Uncategorized

The gloves are off

Our very own regular from the blog comments Mr Geodaddi sparked a feature on BBC Radio 4 today, when he phoned in to ask why modern TV historians are allowed to get their grubby fingerprints all over the precious manuscripts. Skip to 20mins50 to hear the answer…

The Guinness cookery book of records 2013

It’s been 2 years since the last Bakery records so without further ado, here are the official most popular Bakery videos… All record true on 31st December 2013 MOST VIEWED OFFICIAL BAKERY VIDEO (YouTube.com/bakerytv or Vimeo.com/thebakery) 3) 5,449 views – Crap audio transcription rewrites classic novels (2/2) (since April 2010) 2) 7,654 views – David O’Doherty interview part 1 (since Jan 2010) 1) 76,487 views – The Last Bookshop (since April 2013) MOST VIEWED CO-PRODUCED BAKERY VIDEO (hosted by external YouTube accounts) 3) 27,282 views – Advertising with Bells on (since Dec 2011; produced for Fold7) 2) 39,785 views – Edge of the Earth (since May 2012; produced for Syd Arthur) 1) 41,686 views – Sty TV winners’ introduction (since July 2010; produced for WickedPigUK)

Bakery Analytics

What do people type into Google which sends them to The Bakery? Well, I’ve trawled through 3 and a half year’s worth of Google Analytics to answer that question. I present a list of my favourite Google search terms which led people here. They’re all genuine, with my own thoughts in brackets… Art is tedious “pretentious arsehole” coffee and corks (anyone in particular?) marzipan diorama king julian cake celebrity dogging peado (5 angry dyslexic Daily Mail readers searched this) typical kentish barazine (this has been searched a baffling 117 times!) audio clip from the battle of marathon (might prove a little thin on the ground…) bakeries closed on the seventh day in england beautiful naked upturned breasts canterbury “too many students” cartoons of animals naked at the bakery (I don’t know what to say about this one) cockfosters dodecahedron satanism (my favourite kind of Satanism) dogging podcast (do people really make podcasts of that sort of thing!?) grimshaw mill (ee-bah-gum, it’s tough up north, down t’pit, what’s a saveloy? etc etc) herne bay shagging how to make savaloys (Jan Grimshaw does some fervent research) is kent uni good for film (No! Don’t do it!) melissa’s advanced tossing guide! Middle...

The Guinness Cookery Book of Records 2011

All records true on 31st December 2011 MOST VIEWED OFFICIAL BAKERY VIDEO (YouTube.com/bakerytv or Vimeo.com/thebakery) 3) 2,441 views – Pipe Smoking: Cherry in a Falcon (since Feb 2010) 2) 3,359 views – David O’Doherty interview part 1 (since Jan 2010) 1) 4,784 views – Crap audio transcription rewrites classic novels 2/2 (since April 2010) MOST VIEWED CO-PRODUCED BAKERY VIDEO (hosted by external YouTube accounts) 3) 7,149 views – Kent Uni is… (since Nov 2008; produced for KentUnIs) 2) 16,460 views – Advertising with Bells on (since Dec 2011; produced for Fold 7) 1) 41,534 views – Sty TV winners’ introduction (since July 2010; produced for WickedPigUK) THE NEVER WORK WITH ANIMALS AWARD (recognising screen time and variety of locations/difficulty of acting) 3) Numerous chickens and sheep, for Job Market Julian: Why do a placement year? (1/3) Farmhand 2) 2 reindeer in an office, for Advertising with Bells on 1) Aslan the dog, for Sty TV comedy challenges – episode 3: Invasion MOST PRODUCTIVE MONTH IN BAKERY BLOGGING HISTORY 3) May 2009 – 13 posts 2) December 2010 – 24 posts 1) December 2011 – 30 posts MOST CENSORED BAKERY PROJECTS 3) Job Market Julian: Before settling on a Norwegian...

Advent calendar 17: A song

My name is Adam. I am extremely sorry I am late. I will give all the other chefs a fiver as recompense. Here is a song I found which I quite like…

Advent calendar 16: Have you seen this man?

Tom German has once again failed us all by not posting up his advent blog post in due time. If anybody knows his whereabouts they should contact us immediately. From this photographic evidence it is feared he may currently be trapped in a gladiatorial arena in ancient Greece.

Advent Calendar 9: It was fun while it lasted

On the ninth day of Christmas, The Bakery gave to me: Some self indulgent images of the film making process As hinted at in Gate’s last post, he and I have been hard at work this week with a very exciting little project indeed. There’ve been highs, lows, middles, and even some middle-lows. This film will be ready for Gate’s post some time on Wednesday 14th (not Monday the 12th as his post indicated). In the mean time, allow me to get you all juiced up with some ‘making of’ photos. Oh, and keep your eyes peeled: I expect The Sun will be picking up these images and putting them on the front page any day now. So without further ado, here are some photos. Enjoy.

Sampling for music

I think most people are familiar with the use of sampling in music, whether they are conscious of it or not. Probably the most obvious example for me in popular music is the use of Camille Yarbrough’s Take Yo Praise in Fat Boy Slim’s Praise You. Another example would be Nas’s use of James Brown’s track, or more hilariously Dr Dre’s use of David Alexrod’s work. Hip hop as a genre, is just full of it. So there’s an obvious theme emerging here: modern musicians are often looking through the vast catalogue of decades of recorded music, for inspiration and more often than not using this to directly inform their music of the moment. Recently i came across a musician called Gerry Diver, who i believe is doing something quite original and tremendous with this use of the old, to inform the new. But instead of taking the tunes of the old musicians, he is taking their voices. And not even their voices whilst in song, but their voices whilst in conversation. And instead of just cutting and pasting voices over the top of a readily made melody, he’s creating a melody informed by the nuances in their voices. It...

Ben & Amy: Tea

Bakery fans with long memories and short trousers may recall the halcyon days of our involvement with community radio station CSR FM. A particular highlight of the schedules back in the old days was Alex Cross’s tremendous Prog Rock, Jazz and Blues show which used to go out in the small hours. I was a guest in the studio on a number of occasions, promoting Konkers, but also enjoying Alex’s deadpan musings on everything from Pink Floyd to Steely Dan. One week Alex introduced a track by some friends of his, which proved to be a surrealist Dr Seussian ode to that great pillar of the British Empire: tea. Now, I’m a great lover of the tea leaf, and frankly look down on anybody who doesn’t consume a mandatory twelve cups a day. So I was instantly smitten by the track, and was later delighted to discover that the brother/sister duo behind this great work (Ben & Amy) were no one-hit-wonders. It also turned out that they were jolly decent chaps, with complimentary things to say about the world of Konkerbury. So, when CSR broadcast a whole Konkers Night in 2008 it was a pleasure to invite them to...

Another bafflingly popular advert from the industry that brought you the gocompare man

I hope you all had an extended weekend that didn’t depress you too much. Check out this ad for those small bags of gristle that Walls attempt to call sausages. It’s got the YouTubers ‘liking’ in their droves…